The Hideous Assault of the Devil Onion

I mentioned in my “On Writing” post that I had, at various points, kicked around the idea of writing collections of short stories, either with specific themes or through-lines of characters or overarching stories. A couple of years ago I had come up with an idea for one of the former, which was to be entitled “Bizarre Tales of the Bizarre!”

This collection would have been a set of short stories featuring my favorite type of writing: straight up random insanity and wackiness. This particular story is the only one for which I completed a first draft, featured below with some minor edits (so I guess this is really just a second draft?) 

I hate onions. I really, really hate onions. One of my favorite food-related sayings is “Onions are the devil!” So one day I thought, okay, what about an actual onion monster? So here it is. It’s pointless and ridiculous – my favorite kind of story to write.  Continue reading